Posts
For those of you who struggle with knowing the resons why, here is something more to wonder about!!
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
And my FAVORITE...
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.
Monday, July 31, 2006
Saturday, July 29, 2006
Pixel Perfect
I used to hold Disney highly suspect when my kids were younger. There were a lot of things in the late 80's and early 90's that just seemed so unnecessary for children's programming. But something happened in the mid 90's at Disney. I don't know what it was (probably a personnel change?) but what ever changed, I liked it!
Now that my kids are getting older we have discovered the Disney Channel. And I absolutely love so many of the "on purpose" points Disney is sending to the kids of this upcoming generation.
In a world where a girls self-image is so distorted due to constantly comparing herself to the magazine covers and a young boy's taste for the "ideal girl" are fashioned by those illusions on the magazine covers I am so glad Disney is at the forefront of blowing that myth out of the water! I love the fact that actresses like Raven Symone are shown to be beautiful and healthy; while not being the anorexic icon of Hollywood. Disney shows beauty as being more than a physical trait, but a character trait.
Not long ago, Disney made a movie called Pixel Perfect. The whole premise of the movie was that what you see on the magazines is NOT reality but rather the work of a good graphic artist at a computer who does "nips and tucks" with the click of his mouse.
Okay, well at least that is what I got our of the movie. What it was really about is a boy who designed his "ideal girl" by picking the traits that he liked in a girl. He had a hologram program on his computer that made this hologram into a lifesize clone of "The Perfect Girl"...only problem was the hologram was an illusion and when it encountered sunlight it vanished!
The boy who created this hologram had taken some of the characteristics that he liked of one of his female friends who happened to have a crush on him. He left out the characteristics that annoyed him. So he took reality, tweaked it, and created the flawless, ideal girl...an illusion, a hologram.
As the story unfolds, this hologram meets the boy's friend whom she was fashioned after...they develop a rocky, but working "relationship". The friend has no idea this new girl is not "real". Jealousy grows. In the end the boy discovers that his "pixel perfect" girlfriend is rather cold, unemotional, lacks feeling...and learns that he prefers "the real thing", his true friend...with bumps and warts and all.
There was a song from the soundtrack of this movie that showed up on my playlist in iTunes the other day. It must have been downloaded when I took music files from Brad and Laura's mp3 folder. So in the middle of the emotional roller coaster about ending the friendship that I have been talking abou this week, this song came loud and clear over my computer speakers...and suddenly I felt like I had learned a VERY profound life lesson...one I hope that my daughter will learn as we talk about these issues and how to avoid manipulative and toxic friendships.
So, I thought I would give Disney a thunderous applause for reminding this wife and mother a very valuable lesson that most people learn in junior high school!
Enjoy the lyrics of the song!
PERFECTLY
Now that my kids are getting older we have discovered the Disney Channel. And I absolutely love so many of the "on purpose" points Disney is sending to the kids of this upcoming generation.
In a world where a girls self-image is so distorted due to constantly comparing herself to the magazine covers and a young boy's taste for the "ideal girl" are fashioned by those illusions on the magazine covers I am so glad Disney is at the forefront of blowing that myth out of the water! I love the fact that actresses like Raven Symone are shown to be beautiful and healthy; while not being the anorexic icon of Hollywood. Disney shows beauty as being more than a physical trait, but a character trait.
Not long ago, Disney made a movie called Pixel Perfect. The whole premise of the movie was that what you see on the magazines is NOT reality but rather the work of a good graphic artist at a computer who does "nips and tucks" with the click of his mouse.
Okay, well at least that is what I got our of the movie. What it was really about is a boy who designed his "ideal girl" by picking the traits that he liked in a girl. He had a hologram program on his computer that made this hologram into a lifesize clone of "The Perfect Girl"...only problem was the hologram was an illusion and when it encountered sunlight it vanished!
The boy who created this hologram had taken some of the characteristics that he liked of one of his female friends who happened to have a crush on him. He left out the characteristics that annoyed him. So he took reality, tweaked it, and created the flawless, ideal girl...an illusion, a hologram.As the story unfolds, this hologram meets the boy's friend whom she was fashioned after...they develop a rocky, but working "relationship". The friend has no idea this new girl is not "real". Jealousy grows. In the end the boy discovers that his "pixel perfect" girlfriend is rather cold, unemotional, lacks feeling...and learns that he prefers "the real thing", his true friend...with bumps and warts and all.
There was a song from the soundtrack of this movie that showed up on my playlist in iTunes the other day. It must have been downloaded when I took music files from Brad and Laura's mp3 folder. So in the middle of the emotional roller coaster about ending the friendship that I have been talking abou this week, this song came loud and clear over my computer speakers...and suddenly I felt like I had learned a VERY profound life lesson...one I hope that my daughter will learn as we talk about these issues and how to avoid manipulative and toxic friendships.
So, I thought I would give Disney a thunderous applause for reminding this wife and mother a very valuable lesson that most people learn in junior high school!
Enjoy the lyrics of the song!
PERFECTLY
by Huckapoo
I like who I am, but I guess you don't
I like who I am, but I guess you don't
I think that I can
But you think I won't
Amount to anything at all
If you love me, you sure show it strange
Is there anything that you would want to change?
I can't be your paper doll.
Chorus:
I wanna be perfect, but I'm me...
I wanna be flawless
but you see
every little crack, every chip, every dent, every little mistake
I wanna be perfect
Just like you,
but there's only so much
that a girl can do
When I look in the mirror
It makes sense to me...perfectly.
I like worn out shoes
You like high heels and fantasies
But I'm what's real
I guess you could say
The shoe don't fit
Maybe I'm from Venus
You're from mars
My imperfections are what they are
I guess one of us must deal with it
I try to fit in the mold that you make
But I'm tired of playing this little charade
I wanna be perfect, but I'm me...
I wanna be flawless
but you see
every little crack, every chip, every dent, every little mistake
I wanna be perfect
Just like you,
but there's only so much
that a girl can do
When I look in the mirror
It makes sense to me...perfectly.
I wanna be flawless
but you see
every little crack, every chip, every dent, every little mistake
I wanna be perfect
Just like you,
but there's only so much
that a girl can do
When I look in the mirror
It makes sense to me...perfectly.
Hhmmmm....well, heres hoping that now that I am pushing 40 I will have mastered this very valuable life lesson that I learned from Disney as an adult!
Dawn
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Holiness, Eye Patches, Free Will...OH MY!!!
I was sharing with Brad yesterday about a speaker I heard once who told a story of growing up in his grandfather's church. He specifically remembered one sermon seried his grandfather did about holiness. He said "holiness" was a very difficult concept for a kid to grasp but he was very interested in becoming holy. He prayed and asked God to send him a good example of true holiness that he could learn from.
The sermon series on holiness continued for a few weeks. One week the scriptural text for that Sunday was from Matthew 5:
As the sermon went on he found himself needing to leave the sanctuary because he had to use the restroom. As he was leaving the sanctuary a man walked into the church wearing an eye patch! He stood there in total awe! He thought "now that must be a really Holy man because he actually DID it!"
Follow me on my rabbit trail here...Brad and I have recently discovered the TV Program "24". In one of the season closers the main character found himself and a close friend in a situation that was life and death. In order to save his friends life (who was handcuffed to a bomb that would release a catastrophic virus that would not only kill his friend, but millions of people if it went airborne) he took the axe from the emergency fire station and literally cut his friend's hand off to save the lives of many.
I remember making the comment (half in jest at the time) "You know, if your right hand offends you, cut it off! Better to lose and arm than your whole life!"
I've just never had a situation hit so close to home with me regarding this principle until it came to my decision to end this friendship I spoke about earlier this week.
I remember telling Brad for years that this particular friend was like my right arm (in our happier days). I actually know now, more than ever before, what it truly means to cut off that arm when it offends or threatens to impede your walk with the Lord.
This is one of the harder lessons of "free will" I have discovered. It is so contrary to our human nature to inflict pain upon ourselves. But I had to make a choice. In my free will, I chose to honor God with my whole heart and risk injury to myself to become wholly FREE from this situation.
There is no anesthetic for the heartache that comes. It is only the full faith and assurance that it is an act of obedience and it will be blessed. I will go free. Yet is it hard to celebrate knowing the devestation I caused...yet there is that part of me that REJOICES through the tears. Doing the right thing is not always pain free.
But I overwhelmingly sense that "great cloud of witnesses" that surrounds me and cheers me on. I am truly walking in the reality of what Jesus meant when he said, "Come to Me all who are weary, and I will give you rest. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
I have no words to adequately express how heavy and suffocating the yoke was that I just laid down. I find I am breathing easier and walking lighter.
I thank God for His indescribable gift: JESUS.
He is more than enough. He is all I need. And His grace is sufficient.
Dawn
The sermon series on holiness continued for a few weeks. One week the scriptural text for that Sunday was from Matthew 5:
27 "You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' 28 But
I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.
As the sermon went on he found himself needing to leave the sanctuary because he had to use the restroom. As he was leaving the sanctuary a man walked into the church wearing an eye patch! He stood there in total awe! He thought "now that must be a really Holy man because he actually DID it!"Follow me on my rabbit trail here...Brad and I have recently discovered the TV Program "24". In one of the season closers the main character found himself and a close friend in a situation that was life and death. In order to save his friends life (who was handcuffed to a bomb that would release a catastrophic virus that would not only kill his friend, but millions of people if it went airborne) he took the axe from the emergency fire station and literally cut his friend's hand off to save the lives of many.
I remember making the comment (half in jest at the time) "You know, if your right hand offends you, cut it off! Better to lose and arm than your whole life!"
I've just never had a situation hit so close to home with me regarding this principle until it came to my decision to end this friendship I spoke about earlier this week.
I remember telling Brad for years that this particular friend was like my right arm (in our happier days). I actually know now, more than ever before, what it truly means to cut off that arm when it offends or threatens to impede your walk with the Lord.
This is one of the harder lessons of "free will" I have discovered. It is so contrary to our human nature to inflict pain upon ourselves. But I had to make a choice. In my free will, I chose to honor God with my whole heart and risk injury to myself to become wholly FREE from this situation.
There is no anesthetic for the heartache that comes. It is only the full faith and assurance that it is an act of obedience and it will be blessed. I will go free. Yet is it hard to celebrate knowing the devestation I caused...yet there is that part of me that REJOICES through the tears. Doing the right thing is not always pain free.
But I overwhelmingly sense that "great cloud of witnesses" that surrounds me and cheers me on. I am truly walking in the reality of what Jesus meant when he said, "Come to Me all who are weary, and I will give you rest. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
I have no words to adequately express how heavy and suffocating the yoke was that I just laid down. I find I am breathing easier and walking lighter.
I thank God for His indescribable gift: JESUS.
He is more than enough. He is all I need. And His grace is sufficient.
Dawn
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Biblical Chemistry
I was an excellent Chemistry student in High School and College! The problem was I was a horrible math student!! My chemistry teacher could not believe I struggled with algerbra as bad as I did since I was solving and balancing equations in the chemistry lab like it was my second nature ... something I could do in my sleep.
The coach who taugh my algebra class had a conversation with my chemistry teacher once in the teacher's lounge about my math problem. Finally they both spoke with me about the matter. I tried to explain that the coach could not adequately explain the reason WHY the equation worked the way it did (yes, this has been a longtime stronghold in my life...knowing the reason WHY!) He just always told me "Because thats the rule. You dont need to know the reason why, just follow the rule and you will do fine!"
On the other hand, my chemistry teacher, by example, was able to explain the WHY of balancing the equation by our doing labs and solving for the unknown solution. It only took me ONE TIME in the chemistry lab of not following the rule (as coach suggested in algebra) to get the BIG PICTURE. It did not take me long after picking out the shards of my pyrex test tube (which is supposed to be indestructable by fire!) out of the particle board ceiling of the chem lab to understand that there is a method to the madness of the rule--even if I dont understand WHY!!
Years later, while teaching VBS in my early college days I was given the opportunity to explain the concept of the Trinity to 4 years olds! I dont know who wrote that curriculum...but I would not reccommend it! 4 year olds can ask the most difficult questions that will leave you STUMPED!! I followed the example of pouring water in an ice tray and putting in the freezer. Later I pulled out the ice cube and placed it over a pot on the stove...we watched the water boil and evaporate. Now somehow a 4 year old was supposed to get the concept that water (H2O) came in 3 forms of liquid, solid and vapor all having the same chemical compound of H2O just in 3 forms. I dont know how much that stuck with THEM, but it has stayed with me forever!
I saw the picture above and I thought it would be perfect to illustrate the deeper recesses of my mind lately! (OK...quit laughing! I can have a deep thought, ya know!!)
Lately, there has been so much going on in my life that I have been like "contents under pressure". Now I used to watch my grandmother who canned home grown veggies every summer and I KNOW what a pressure cooker does when it lets off steam! The noise could raise the dead! And everyone in the hooue stopped and looked to make sure everything was OK!
As in the photo above the E-State was to represent the "evaporative state" of the solid form of water. I have also been thinking of the 3 forms of H2O in terms of our having a body, soul and spirit.
When our lives (body) get in a state of constant pressure, will our soul (feelings and emotions) line up with the Spirit of God within us and release the E-State....the edification state??
When we are under pressure, the deepest kind of pressure, will that which forces our character to be truly revealed be one of edification ?
I know I've got a long way to go....but thanks to trying to teach 4 years old about the Trinity, I have this longing in my heart that when my ice cube melts and evaporates that I really want it to be pleasing to the Lord. I want to work towards the goal that when I am found in stressful situations that those around me will see grace under pressure. Because the grace IS THERE...but will we appropriate the grace given us in that hour or will we lean to our own understanding?
Give thanks in all circumstances for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you...1 Thes 5:18
Can we be thankful in the midst of the pressures of life??
Our witness DEPENDS on it!
Bidding JOY to your journey (and mine!!),
Dawn
Monday, July 24, 2006
A Friendship on Life Support Just Died
Notice I said a "friendship" on life support just died...not my friend...just the friendship.
This friendship has been on "life support" for over 2 years now...probably more thruthfully told for 10 years, but denial keeps me saying it has really only been the last 2 years.
Just as there is no such thing as a no fault divorce, there is no such thing as a friendship that disintegrates without the fault of both parties involved.
Guilty as charged.
Maybe even more guilty than my "friend".... I pulled the plug.
I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't handle the facade of "friendship" we both mascaraded with...the dark pretense of living a lie. We were no more true friends than a bacteria is to an antibiotic. (But we were about as toxic to each other.) Its just that at ONE TIME we were friends. But time goes on, and seasons change. The few things that once drew us close in heart and spirit are now the very things that repel us like oil and water.
I think there is just something that is ingrained in Southern Women...we must be polite. Add that to the (personal) belief that as Christians there should be no "irreconcilable differences" among Christians...and you end up with two people who just dont know it is okay to BURY the poor horse we have both repeatedly beat to death with a stick!
I knew I would feel bad...and I do feel bad. But what suprises me is the guilt I feel because of the huge sense of RELIEF I feel in just having made the decision. I wrote the letter. It is stamped and going out in the mail tomorrow. The only way this letter is not going to get to her is if she writes "return to sender" on it...and that would only confirm that we both feel this is the right decision.
I shared with one of my closest friends that I had made the decision to not continue with the turmoil of this friendship and I think she's got a $5 bet against me that I will cave!
I am learning the value of healthy friendships...and the value of letting go of toxic friendships.
I just wish I understood why letting go of the toxic relationship still hurts the heart.
Heartache and RELIEF...so many mixed emotions.
I feel like I am at the crossroads. Much like when I became a Christian. I had an old life that I enjoyed...but my new life held much promise and hope. Both held my heart...but I made a choice. I cut ties to my old life and began a NEW LIFE...and I was blessed.
I feel like I have to cut off this friendship to ever feel whole and healthy again.
Who knows...she may feel just as relieved. Maybe we were both just to polite to want to hurt the other.
I guess that was a pretty bad eulogy to a pretty bad end to a friendship.
My son has a T-Shirt that says "Live your life so the Preacher doesn't have to LIE at your funeral!"
I wish I had more good things to say about this friendship...but right now I just can't remember any of them because it is so clouded by the toxicity of the last 2 years.
So in short...We had a 19 year friendship. It died. Now it is time to bury it.
Dawn
This friendship has been on "life support" for over 2 years now...probably more thruthfully told for 10 years, but denial keeps me saying it has really only been the last 2 years.
Just as there is no such thing as a no fault divorce, there is no such thing as a friendship that disintegrates without the fault of both parties involved.
Guilty as charged.
Maybe even more guilty than my "friend".... I pulled the plug.
I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't handle the facade of "friendship" we both mascaraded with...the dark pretense of living a lie. We were no more true friends than a bacteria is to an antibiotic. (But we were about as toxic to each other.) Its just that at ONE TIME we were friends. But time goes on, and seasons change. The few things that once drew us close in heart and spirit are now the very things that repel us like oil and water.
I think there is just something that is ingrained in Southern Women...we must be polite. Add that to the (personal) belief that as Christians there should be no "irreconcilable differences" among Christians...and you end up with two people who just dont know it is okay to BURY the poor horse we have both repeatedly beat to death with a stick!
I knew I would feel bad...and I do feel bad. But what suprises me is the guilt I feel because of the huge sense of RELIEF I feel in just having made the decision. I wrote the letter. It is stamped and going out in the mail tomorrow. The only way this letter is not going to get to her is if she writes "return to sender" on it...and that would only confirm that we both feel this is the right decision.
I shared with one of my closest friends that I had made the decision to not continue with the turmoil of this friendship and I think she's got a $5 bet against me that I will cave!
I am learning the value of healthy friendships...and the value of letting go of toxic friendships.
I just wish I understood why letting go of the toxic relationship still hurts the heart.
Heartache and RELIEF...so many mixed emotions.
I feel like I am at the crossroads. Much like when I became a Christian. I had an old life that I enjoyed...but my new life held much promise and hope. Both held my heart...but I made a choice. I cut ties to my old life and began a NEW LIFE...and I was blessed.
I feel like I have to cut off this friendship to ever feel whole and healthy again.
Who knows...she may feel just as relieved. Maybe we were both just to polite to want to hurt the other.
I guess that was a pretty bad eulogy to a pretty bad end to a friendship.
My son has a T-Shirt that says "Live your life so the Preacher doesn't have to LIE at your funeral!"
I wish I had more good things to say about this friendship...but right now I just can't remember any of them because it is so clouded by the toxicity of the last 2 years.
So in short...We had a 19 year friendship. It died. Now it is time to bury it.
Dawn
Monday, July 17, 2006
My Soul Longs After Thee
The Story of Starbuck: The Dog who missed his Girl
This morning we woke up to a very sick dog. We had noticed over the last 2 days that he was having diahhrea. (Sorry if that is TMI for my squeemish crowd.) But this morning it was severe. He was passing BLOOD. I knew for certain this could NOT be a good thing. I called the vet in a near panic...what was I supposed to tell Laura?
Was this FATAL?? Would we have to put our pooch down??
I begged the receptionist to let me bring Starbuck in ASAP. I woke Laura up and told her we needed to get Starbuck to the Vet. We took him outside and hosed him off (I will spare you the details, but just know there was a reason!) and we "diapered" him with a towel and took off for the vet's office.
I was truly prepared for the worse case scenario. I had been praying the whole way as I drove white-knuckled to the vet. Dear God, please let Starbuck be okay!!! And God, please dont let this vet bill be too expensive!!
The vet checked the stool sample we brought in. He looked a bit amused as he came back in and started questioning us if anything had changed in our routine over the last week. We started thinking through any ideas of what may have changed when Laura said, "I dont know, I was at camp all week." The vet looked at the dog, looked at Laura...asked me how the dog did while Laura was gone. I told him the dog seemed to just mope around the house. It was as though he knew she was gone. He sort of giggled and said he thought he knew what the problem was.
He assured us the stool sample was bacteria free, parasite free, and there was no cause of concern of there being a disease. He said "What we have here is a classic case of tummy troubles caused by separation anxiety!"
The social worker inside me just shook my head. You have GOT to be kidding me!! He went on to explain that sometimes when pets get upset they get tummy troubles like humans do. And on accasion they worry themselves sick! A stress related illness in our pup!! He gave Starbuck a steroid shot and sent us home with anti-diahhrea meds.
Once home, Starbuck has been sitting quietly at Laura's feet all morning. He has watched her every move. Even now he is watching her crochet...firmly planted at her feet.
As I was driving home I was thinking back on the old chorus:
As a deer panteth for the water
so my soul longeth after Thee.
You alone are my heart's desire
and I long to worship you...
And I just know that someday the story of Laura and Starbuck will end up in one of Brad's sermon illustrations of how our hearts should be longing after God! You have to admit....that will preach!! Now, I just need to find out if Discovery Camp has accomodations for pets next year! LOL!! What's the dog to do without his girl??
This morning we woke up to a very sick dog. We had noticed over the last 2 days that he was having diahhrea. (Sorry if that is TMI for my squeemish crowd.) But this morning it was severe. He was passing BLOOD. I knew for certain this could NOT be a good thing. I called the vet in a near panic...what was I supposed to tell Laura?
Was this FATAL?? Would we have to put our pooch down??
I begged the receptionist to let me bring Starbuck in ASAP. I woke Laura up and told her we needed to get Starbuck to the Vet. We took him outside and hosed him off (I will spare you the details, but just know there was a reason!) and we "diapered" him with a towel and took off for the vet's office.I was truly prepared for the worse case scenario. I had been praying the whole way as I drove white-knuckled to the vet. Dear God, please let Starbuck be okay!!! And God, please dont let this vet bill be too expensive!!
The vet checked the stool sample we brought in. He looked a bit amused as he came back in and started questioning us if anything had changed in our routine over the last week. We started thinking through any ideas of what may have changed when Laura said, "I dont know, I was at camp all week." The vet looked at the dog, looked at Laura...asked me how the dog did while Laura was gone. I told him the dog seemed to just mope around the house. It was as though he knew she was gone. He sort of giggled and said he thought he knew what the problem was.
He assured us the stool sample was bacteria free, parasite free, and there was no cause of concern of there being a disease. He said "What we have here is a classic case of tummy troubles caused by separation anxiety!"
The social worker inside me just shook my head. You have GOT to be kidding me!! He went on to explain that sometimes when pets get upset they get tummy troubles like humans do. And on accasion they worry themselves sick! A stress related illness in our pup!! He gave Starbuck a steroid shot and sent us home with anti-diahhrea meds.
Once home, Starbuck has been sitting quietly at Laura's feet all morning. He has watched her every move. Even now he is watching her crochet...firmly planted at her feet.
As I was driving home I was thinking back on the old chorus:As a deer panteth for the water
so my soul longeth after Thee.
You alone are my heart's desire
and I long to worship you...
And I just know that someday the story of Laura and Starbuck will end up in one of Brad's sermon illustrations of how our hearts should be longing after God! You have to admit....that will preach!! Now, I just need to find out if Discovery Camp has accomodations for pets next year! LOL!! What's the dog to do without his girl??
God is God and I am Not
Remembering Pastoral Advice that Helped Anchor Me
Recently I have been pondering my spiritual heritage. The strength and wisdom that my church family has sown into me over the years.
This morning, my dear friend and beloved sister in Christ, Vivian sent me a devotional that she said was a MUST READ! As I read through it, I had to agree. I wont recount the whole devotional for you, I will just copy it at the end of this post. But this devotional reminded me of one of those "anchored moments" in my Christian growth.
There are times when someone who is much like a mentor in your life says something that STICKS and changes your life forever. It is a spiritual stake in the ground...a stone of rememberance, so to speak, that Joshua spoke of, and quite often a place where you find deliverance and freedom.
The time I am remebering is after my fourth miscarriage. Were were devestated. This was the first time in all of our pregnancy losses that we had a tiny little body to deal with. Beyond the grief of losing the twins, there was an anger brewing in me at the medical community because they would not do any testing on me to find a cause of the miscarriages until I had lost 3 consecuticve babies. I needed to know an answer as to why this was happening. Since I was pregnant with twins and lost one 3 weeks prior to the other, it was as if I had two separate miscarriages though it was one twin pregnancy. Twin B (Josiah David) was a fighter! We got to see his heart beat on sonogram and then the next day he was born...far to early to survive outside of the womb. DEVESTATING.
I remember sitting in my pastors office. He shared in our loss and even shared about the losses he and his wife had earlier in their life. He was very comapssionate to our pain. As I sat there in his office expressing my anger at the medical community and the frustration of not knowing what was going on with my body that I kept miscarrying my babies, I must have said 10 times, "I just want answers. I want to know WHY!"
Pastor David, seeing past my actual question to the true need, addressed my question with, "What if God never gives you an answer?"
That kind of took me off guard because I was thinking medical answers...or so I thought. It was a Holy Spirit momen of revelation...an "anchor moment" for me. Was I really wanting to know the medical reason why? Well, in a very physical sense, YES...but there was something far deeper in my heart that needed to be addressed and Pastor recognized that. As I said in my last post, Pastor David shoots straight with you! He is honest, compassionate, and allows the Holy Spirit to bring to the surface the REAL need...and he addresses THAT need.
He sent me home with an arsenal of scriptures that I wrestled with...much like Jacob wrestling with the angel at Pinneal. Some of the passages I had to deal with, and come to terms with were "What shall separate us from the love of God?" and a list begins to form...among them are the questions of life an death. Was I going to let the death of my children separate me from the love of God?
Pastor went on to tell me the story of a friend of his in seminary who also had endured the loss of a child through miscarriage. His friend never got over his grief, became bitter and angry, and ultimately walked away from God. So pastor asked me again, "What shall separate us from the Love of God?"
Like an arrow through my heart, the truth pierced my heart and took root. And I was able to to confess like the Apostle Paul in Romans, that NOTHING shall separate me from the love of God, neither death nor life......
I am very fortunate to have a pastor who speaks truth--even when it hurts. There was a far deeper need in my life than knowing the medical reasons WHY...there was a spiritual need in my heart that he brought to my attention and helped me deal with. What if God NEVER gave me an answer to those questions? As I wrestled through several other scriptures...I finally came to the conclusion that HE is GOD and I am NOT!!
The Lord gives and the Lord takes away...BLESSED be the name of the LORD!
I hope you enjoy this devotional as much as I did!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
July 17, 2006
God questions
by John Fischer
“God is too good to be unkind, too wise to make mistakes, and too deep to explain himself.” - Unknown
Have you ever thought about the fact that God doesn't have to explain himself? Or as Paul put it, "Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been his counselor?” (Romans 11:34)
Think about how often we ask or hear the following:
Why did God allow this thing to happen to me?
Why would God allow such pain and suffering on this planet?
If there is a God, why doesn't he do something about the injustice in the world?
And then think about our attempts at answering these questions while God remains silent. We not only throw questions and challenges at him, we have the audacity to think we can speak for him as well!
The worst part about this is that we act as if we deserve answers to these and similar questions. We even go so far as to suspend belief in God until we get these questions resolved to our satisfaction. Wait a minute: This is the God of the universe we are talking about. Who do we think we are? Some of this is almost on the level of grabbing a teenager by the ear, sitting him down in a chair, and saying, “Well … aren't you going to explain yourself, young man?”
What we are missing here is a relative level of humility commensurate with some acknowledgment of who we are (and are not) and who God is. In whose book is God required to explain himself? Not in any book I know of.
Moreover, in the book he left for us, the Bible, one of its oldest stories is about a righteous and good man who was afflicted with severe loss, pain, and suffering for no apparent reason. For the bulk of the book of Job, Job listens to four friends trying to figure out his predicament. After 37 chapters of justifications, accusations, and defense, they are no closer to an answer than when they started. That's when God shows up on the scene and speaks for himself. And in four more chapters, he refuses to give one shred of evidence that he intends to answer their questions. What he does present them is a series of more questions that Job, in his finiteness cannot answer – questions that establish himself as God with no requirement to explain himself, and Job, as a mere man with limited understanding and no right to know.
In the end, Job utters these words: “You asked, 'Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorance?' It is I – and I was talking about things I knew nothing about, things far too wonderful for me … I had only heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes. I take back everything I said, and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance.” (Job 42:3, 5-6 NLT)
One of the most fundamental steps of believing is deciding we are not God nor do we want to be. That's when we get down on our knees and worship God as God. That posture is the beginning of finding out.
Recently I have been pondering my spiritual heritage. The strength and wisdom that my church family has sown into me over the years.
This morning, my dear friend and beloved sister in Christ, Vivian sent me a devotional that she said was a MUST READ! As I read through it, I had to agree. I wont recount the whole devotional for you, I will just copy it at the end of this post. But this devotional reminded me of one of those "anchored moments" in my Christian growth.
There are times when someone who is much like a mentor in your life says something that STICKS and changes your life forever. It is a spiritual stake in the ground...a stone of rememberance, so to speak, that Joshua spoke of, and quite often a place where you find deliverance and freedom.
The time I am remebering is after my fourth miscarriage. Were were devestated. This was the first time in all of our pregnancy losses that we had a tiny little body to deal with. Beyond the grief of losing the twins, there was an anger brewing in me at the medical community because they would not do any testing on me to find a cause of the miscarriages until I had lost 3 consecuticve babies. I needed to know an answer as to why this was happening. Since I was pregnant with twins and lost one 3 weeks prior to the other, it was as if I had two separate miscarriages though it was one twin pregnancy. Twin B (Josiah David) was a fighter! We got to see his heart beat on sonogram and then the next day he was born...far to early to survive outside of the womb. DEVESTATING.
I remember sitting in my pastors office. He shared in our loss and even shared about the losses he and his wife had earlier in their life. He was very comapssionate to our pain. As I sat there in his office expressing my anger at the medical community and the frustration of not knowing what was going on with my body that I kept miscarrying my babies, I must have said 10 times, "I just want answers. I want to know WHY!"
Pastor David, seeing past my actual question to the true need, addressed my question with, "What if God never gives you an answer?"
That kind of took me off guard because I was thinking medical answers...or so I thought. It was a Holy Spirit momen of revelation...an "anchor moment" for me. Was I really wanting to know the medical reason why? Well, in a very physical sense, YES...but there was something far deeper in my heart that needed to be addressed and Pastor recognized that. As I said in my last post, Pastor David shoots straight with you! He is honest, compassionate, and allows the Holy Spirit to bring to the surface the REAL need...and he addresses THAT need.
He sent me home with an arsenal of scriptures that I wrestled with...much like Jacob wrestling with the angel at Pinneal. Some of the passages I had to deal with, and come to terms with were "What shall separate us from the love of God?" and a list begins to form...among them are the questions of life an death. Was I going to let the death of my children separate me from the love of God?
Pastor went on to tell me the story of a friend of his in seminary who also had endured the loss of a child through miscarriage. His friend never got over his grief, became bitter and angry, and ultimately walked away from God. So pastor asked me again, "What shall separate us from the Love of God?"
Like an arrow through my heart, the truth pierced my heart and took root. And I was able to to confess like the Apostle Paul in Romans, that NOTHING shall separate me from the love of God, neither death nor life......
I am very fortunate to have a pastor who speaks truth--even when it hurts. There was a far deeper need in my life than knowing the medical reasons WHY...there was a spiritual need in my heart that he brought to my attention and helped me deal with. What if God NEVER gave me an answer to those questions? As I wrestled through several other scriptures...I finally came to the conclusion that HE is GOD and I am NOT!!
The Lord gives and the Lord takes away...BLESSED be the name of the LORD!
I hope you enjoy this devotional as much as I did!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
July 17, 2006
God questions
by John Fischer
“God is too good to be unkind, too wise to make mistakes, and too deep to explain himself.” - Unknown
Have you ever thought about the fact that God doesn't have to explain himself? Or as Paul put it, "Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been his counselor?” (Romans 11:34)
Think about how often we ask or hear the following:
Why did God allow this thing to happen to me?
Why would God allow such pain and suffering on this planet?
If there is a God, why doesn't he do something about the injustice in the world?
And then think about our attempts at answering these questions while God remains silent. We not only throw questions and challenges at him, we have the audacity to think we can speak for him as well!
The worst part about this is that we act as if we deserve answers to these and similar questions. We even go so far as to suspend belief in God until we get these questions resolved to our satisfaction. Wait a minute: This is the God of the universe we are talking about. Who do we think we are? Some of this is almost on the level of grabbing a teenager by the ear, sitting him down in a chair, and saying, “Well … aren't you going to explain yourself, young man?”
What we are missing here is a relative level of humility commensurate with some acknowledgment of who we are (and are not) and who God is. In whose book is God required to explain himself? Not in any book I know of.
Moreover, in the book he left for us, the Bible, one of its oldest stories is about a righteous and good man who was afflicted with severe loss, pain, and suffering for no apparent reason. For the bulk of the book of Job, Job listens to four friends trying to figure out his predicament. After 37 chapters of justifications, accusations, and defense, they are no closer to an answer than when they started. That's when God shows up on the scene and speaks for himself. And in four more chapters, he refuses to give one shred of evidence that he intends to answer their questions. What he does present them is a series of more questions that Job, in his finiteness cannot answer – questions that establish himself as God with no requirement to explain himself, and Job, as a mere man with limited understanding and no right to know.
In the end, Job utters these words: “You asked, 'Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorance?' It is I – and I was talking about things I knew nothing about, things far too wonderful for me … I had only heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes. I take back everything I said, and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance.” (Job 42:3, 5-6 NLT)
One of the most fundamental steps of believing is deciding we are not God nor do we want to be. That's when we get down on our knees and worship God as God. That posture is the beginning of finding out.
Monday, July 10, 2006
A Rich Heritage and a Strong Future
Waxing Nostalgic & Still Dreaming Dreams
I went to a college that had this slogan: A Rich Heritage and a Strong Future. I used to think it was kind of corny, but it was a lot better than the other slogan they had for a while...UMHB: A great place to Live & Learn.
So in all consideration a rich heritage and a strong future really was a lot better. But you could not have convinced me of that fact THEN.
I am coming up on my 20 year high school reunion. How can that be? When I close my eyes I am still 15 years old! I am sure that could be psycho-analyzed to death but please spare me your gifted interpretations of what that may mean! LOL!
Of course, I have NO INTENTIONS of setting foot in my high school reunion!! I am the tragic tale of the cheerleader who got fat. No way I'm gonna go!! Besides, I dont want to run into "Kim S" who told me that I was too fat and ugly to ever make cheerleader. Even though I made the squad and she didn't, it is amazing what sticks with your after all those years. My fragile ego could not take proving her right....ahhhh VANITY, VANITY, all is vanity.
So let's fast forward to a MUCH HAPPIER PLACE!!!!
As I have been thinking on my heritage and my future, I realize it is those people who made the Spiritual deposits into my life that have strengthened me in Christ and made me into who I am today.
As I remember back to my day of SALVATION (March 20, 1988) I thank God for the family that he spiritually birthed me into at Woodlawn Baptist Church in Austin, Texas. I don't know that there could have been a more perfect "spiritual family of origin". These people were my anchor in a storm!! So I must share them with you!
Seated on the far left is John Molina. He was the pastor of the Spanish Mission outreach of our church. He was my first introduction to missions!
Seated center is Pastor Jack Burton. I got saved and baptized on the same day. I'm sure pastor Jack thought he better get me baptized and discipled quick before I got away! And I'm not so sure that if the church had not embraced me the way they did, that I would still be living a vibrant Christian life. This church was an IV Infusion of LIFE to me. I remember when I first felt called to ministry that I called Pastor Jack to tell him God was calling me to ministry and I needed to know what a seminary was because I thought I was supposed to go! I remember his chuckle as he explained a seminary was a graduate school after college. And it was THAT conversation that led me into pursuing a college education! I was saved in March and attending Austin community college in August!
To the far right is Tom Gillespie. He was my choir director. He was willing to take a "wide-eyed with wonder" 18 year old girl and let her sing in the adult choir. I had no idea that 18 year olds were not supposed to be "into" such activities as the adult choir...but this was my first introduction to WORSHIP...and I was hooked!
Top row left is Bryan Hall. He was my first crush as a Christian girl. He was the youth & college pastor, and much credit to his integrity, he never embarrassed me after I sent him a dozen red and yellow roses...anonymously...but I think he knew. Maybe it was because the following Sunday when he did an object lesson in the college dept. , he had the table covered with red and yellow paper....coincidence? Byran's major influence in my life was this very SIMPLE life lesson. After he heard my testimony he said this very profound thing, "Dawn, if a man HITS you, that means he does NOT like you!" Now that may sound like a no-brainer to most folks, but having just gotten out of a very abusive relationship...that was a profound and NEW thought to me! (And for the record, Bryan was single. I did not send roses to a married man! I just wanted to clarify!)
Then there was Janet Burton, pastor Jack's wife. She was the minister of Education...she was my first introduction to a woman in ministry, under authority, and able to teach.
Then the far right...Donna McCrary, Children's minister. God bless her! She gave me a job in the Child Development center when I had left my state job with the Board of Pardons and Parole so I could go to college and pursue ministry. She took a real chance with me! She trusted me, having no experience with children, with 11 two year olds. I dont know what I was thinking when I thought to do that nice little craft with the children's hand prints in tempera paint for their mothers! All 11 of them...all at once. Who knew two year olds would want to paint each other? But she loved me anyway and showed me a true example of mercy and grace! (and how to get tempera paint out of hair and clothes!)
Oooooohhhhh how I loved my first church family!! They gave me DEEP roots of faith and heritage, and then certified me for ministry and sent me off to Bible College.
While in college Brad and I settled into Cornerstone Christian Fellowship. Unfortunately I dont have their photos. But Pastor David & Petie Newsome loved us and pastored us as a young married couple. Pastor David did Joshua's baby dedication...a very special time in our life.
From Belton, we came to where we are now...The Vine Fellowship. There is such a sense of destiny and the call of God on this church...of course, you'll have to excuse my biased opinion! There are times I am certain I can hear the heartbeat of this church in my dreams.
Pastor David Kerr is a man of vision and integrity. And he will shoot straight with you! (whether you like it or not...you know, the truth hurts, but someone aught to love you enough to tell you! He has a gift because you still KNOW he loves you even after he tells you the truth!) He has baptized all three of my children and my husband. And he has been known to sing duets with Brad. His musical repotoire consists of such songs as the great 50's sound of "Wonderful" and the recent Rapping Pastor in the song "Best Days" soon to be released.
And though I first was introduced to missions at WBC, Pastor David has fanned into flame a passion for missions and it has spread through my whole family.
This is Rob Hurt (also known as the "blog police" he leaves "warnings" if my blog is not posted in a timely manner.) And much like my experience with getting saved and wanting to know what a "seminary" was, when I really felt God calling me to start writing again, I went to Rob and asked what a BLOG was...I had no clue. So it is Rob who gave me the courage to write again. I have been writing a blog now for almost a year due to Rob's encouragement. Had it not been for Rob's prodding, coaxing and harrassment...(did I say that with my outside voice??).... ahem.....I mean encouragment, I dont know that I would have started writing again. In retrospect, I can see how God has used this whole blogging experience, and being willing to write again, to launch the next chapter of my life as I have begun work with the Lyme and Chronically Ill community through the Texas Public Health Alert. The journey of starting to write begins with getting the thoughts from the brain to the paper. And blogging gave me the courage to step out when the time was right for me to begin the newspaper.
And always saving the best for last...as I journey through my spiritual heritage and embrace a strong future of hope, I owe it all to my favorite pastor of all. My husband, our family shepherd, my fearless leader, my hero. I was introduced to worship at WBC, but I have learned to LIVE a LIFE of worship by watching the example of my husband as he leads our family and an entire congregation of worshippers. I remember when we were planning our wedding, he shared with me a Keith Green song that laid a good foundation in our marriage, and it was something we both took to heart. This song said, "I pledge my head to Heaven for the Gospel. I ask no man on earth to fill my needs. As I told her when we wed, I'd truly rather be found dead, than to love her more than the One Who saved my soul."
Brad has truly been a servant leader in our home. He reminds me that Jesus LAUGHS and enjoys the simplicity of living. I look forward to a strong future that will eventually become the "rich heritage" for my children.
Love, Dawn
I went to a college that had this slogan: A Rich Heritage and a Strong Future. I used to think it was kind of corny, but it was a lot better than the other slogan they had for a while...UMHB: A great place to Live & Learn.
So in all consideration a rich heritage and a strong future really was a lot better. But you could not have convinced me of that fact THEN.
I am coming up on my 20 year high school reunion. How can that be? When I close my eyes I am still 15 years old! I am sure that could be psycho-analyzed to death but please spare me your gifted interpretations of what that may mean! LOL!
Of course, I have NO INTENTIONS of setting foot in my high school reunion!! I am the tragic tale of the cheerleader who got fat. No way I'm gonna go!! Besides, I dont want to run into "Kim S" who told me that I was too fat and ugly to ever make cheerleader. Even though I made the squad and she didn't, it is amazing what sticks with your after all those years. My fragile ego could not take proving her right....ahhhh VANITY, VANITY, all is vanity.
So let's fast forward to a MUCH HAPPIER PLACE!!!!
As I have been thinking on my heritage and my future, I realize it is those people who made the Spiritual deposits into my life that have strengthened me in Christ and made me into who I am today.
As I remember back to my day of SALVATION (March 20, 1988) I thank God for the family that he spiritually birthed me into at Woodlawn Baptist Church in Austin, Texas. I don't know that there could have been a more perfect "spiritual family of origin". These people were my anchor in a storm!! So I must share them with you!
Seated on the far left is John Molina. He was the pastor of the Spanish Mission outreach of our church. He was my first introduction to missions!
Seated center is Pastor Jack Burton. I got saved and baptized on the same day. I'm sure pastor Jack thought he better get me baptized and discipled quick before I got away! And I'm not so sure that if the church had not embraced me the way they did, that I would still be living a vibrant Christian life. This church was an IV Infusion of LIFE to me. I remember when I first felt called to ministry that I called Pastor Jack to tell him God was calling me to ministry and I needed to know what a seminary was because I thought I was supposed to go! I remember his chuckle as he explained a seminary was a graduate school after college. And it was THAT conversation that led me into pursuing a college education! I was saved in March and attending Austin community college in August!
To the far right is Tom Gillespie. He was my choir director. He was willing to take a "wide-eyed with wonder" 18 year old girl and let her sing in the adult choir. I had no idea that 18 year olds were not supposed to be "into" such activities as the adult choir...but this was my first introduction to WORSHIP...and I was hooked!
Top row left is Bryan Hall. He was my first crush as a Christian girl. He was the youth & college pastor, and much credit to his integrity, he never embarrassed me after I sent him a dozen red and yellow roses...anonymously...but I think he knew. Maybe it was because the following Sunday when he did an object lesson in the college dept. , he had the table covered with red and yellow paper....coincidence? Byran's major influence in my life was this very SIMPLE life lesson. After he heard my testimony he said this very profound thing, "Dawn, if a man HITS you, that means he does NOT like you!" Now that may sound like a no-brainer to most folks, but having just gotten out of a very abusive relationship...that was a profound and NEW thought to me! (And for the record, Bryan was single. I did not send roses to a married man! I just wanted to clarify!)
Then there was Janet Burton, pastor Jack's wife. She was the minister of Education...she was my first introduction to a woman in ministry, under authority, and able to teach.
Then the far right...Donna McCrary, Children's minister. God bless her! She gave me a job in the Child Development center when I had left my state job with the Board of Pardons and Parole so I could go to college and pursue ministry. She took a real chance with me! She trusted me, having no experience with children, with 11 two year olds. I dont know what I was thinking when I thought to do that nice little craft with the children's hand prints in tempera paint for their mothers! All 11 of them...all at once. Who knew two year olds would want to paint each other? But she loved me anyway and showed me a true example of mercy and grace! (and how to get tempera paint out of hair and clothes!)
Oooooohhhhh how I loved my first church family!! They gave me DEEP roots of faith and heritage, and then certified me for ministry and sent me off to Bible College.
While in college Brad and I settled into Cornerstone Christian Fellowship. Unfortunately I dont have their photos. But Pastor David & Petie Newsome loved us and pastored us as a young married couple. Pastor David did Joshua's baby dedication...a very special time in our life.
From Belton, we came to where we are now...The Vine Fellowship. There is such a sense of destiny and the call of God on this church...of course, you'll have to excuse my biased opinion! There are times I am certain I can hear the heartbeat of this church in my dreams.
Pastor David Kerr is a man of vision and integrity. And he will shoot straight with you! (whether you like it or not...you know, the truth hurts, but someone aught to love you enough to tell you! He has a gift because you still KNOW he loves you even after he tells you the truth!) He has baptized all three of my children and my husband. And he has been known to sing duets with Brad. His musical repotoire consists of such songs as the great 50's sound of "Wonderful" and the recent Rapping Pastor in the song "Best Days" soon to be released.
And though I first was introduced to missions at WBC, Pastor David has fanned into flame a passion for missions and it has spread through my whole family.
This is Rob Hurt (also known as the "blog police" he leaves "warnings" if my blog is not posted in a timely manner.) And much like my experience with getting saved and wanting to know what a "seminary" was, when I really felt God calling me to start writing again, I went to Rob and asked what a BLOG was...I had no clue. So it is Rob who gave me the courage to write again. I have been writing a blog now for almost a year due to Rob's encouragement. Had it not been for Rob's prodding, coaxing and harrassment...(did I say that with my outside voice??).... ahem.....I mean encouragment, I dont know that I would have started writing again. In retrospect, I can see how God has used this whole blogging experience, and being willing to write again, to launch the next chapter of my life as I have begun work with the Lyme and Chronically Ill community through the Texas Public Health Alert. The journey of starting to write begins with getting the thoughts from the brain to the paper. And blogging gave me the courage to step out when the time was right for me to begin the newspaper.
And always saving the best for last...as I journey through my spiritual heritage and embrace a strong future of hope, I owe it all to my favorite pastor of all. My husband, our family shepherd, my fearless leader, my hero. I was introduced to worship at WBC, but I have learned to LIVE a LIFE of worship by watching the example of my husband as he leads our family and an entire congregation of worshippers. I remember when we were planning our wedding, he shared with me a Keith Green song that laid a good foundation in our marriage, and it was something we both took to heart. This song said, "I pledge my head to Heaven for the Gospel. I ask no man on earth to fill my needs. As I told her when we wed, I'd truly rather be found dead, than to love her more than the One Who saved my soul."
Brad has truly been a servant leader in our home. He reminds me that Jesus LAUGHS and enjoys the simplicity of living. I look forward to a strong future that will eventually become the "rich heritage" for my children.
Love, Dawn
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