This Thing Called Church

The Heart of Which the Dictionary Cannot Even Begin to Define



Okay, to be fair, let's give the dictionary a fair chance:

church Pronunciation Key (chûrch) n.

1. A building for public, especially Christian worship.
2.often Church

a. The company of all Christians regarded as a spiritual body.
b. A specified Christian denomination: the Presbyterian Church.
c. A congregation.

3. Public divine worship in a church; a religious service: goes to church
at Christmas and Easter.

4. The clerical profession; clergy.

5. Ecclesiastical power as distinguished from the secular: the separation of
church and state.

Do you feel enlightened yet?
Me neither....

I've been thinking a lot lately about a long time friendship of mine, almost 19 years in the making, that has completely been derailed by the issue of "church".

The sad part is that both my friend and I are Bible believing Christians...you would think the issue of "church" would be a NON issue...but it is the VERY issue that has sent this friendship into complete chaos and emotional pain on both sides. In the last year we have had little to no communication...at least nothing of substance.

I am looking for a poem I read once that described perfectly what happened in o0ur friendship. If I find it I will post it. It is called "Draw the Circle Again".

In this poem, it showed a new Chrsitian enjoying all the benefits of being newly welcomed into the Family of God. The full expression of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness...etc...then someone got a hold of him and told him to be watchful and aware that not all "Christians" were like "us"...so this person taught the new believer to draw a circle around himself and include fellowship only with those believers who thought like "they" did. So he drew a smaller circle and included fewer people (under the guise of being "likeminded"). Then after a while, this friend taught him that even within this circle there were those who had different ideas and ways of believing and that he should draw the circle smaller again...this repeated several times to even the point that the friend had been drawn out of the circle. Then the poem closes with the Christian man and his wife left in the circle alone...and the man tells his wife, "It looks like it is just you and me...and I am starting to wonder about YOU!"

A few years back, the issue of church became the very point of contention in our friendship. We went round and round about what she felt was an inappropriate expression of church involvement in our family. She felt we gave the church (and activities with our church) too much of our personal family time. And to be fair, I thought she had a lack of proper relationship with a church in the life of their family. We were on complete opposite ends of the balance on this issue.

So this issue of church was a constant source of pressure for us since she felt like a mentor to me. And on many issues she was a great mentor! But on the area of church and life in the Body of Christ, I needed no more authority than the Word of God.

She challenged each and every belief I had...and I just grew weary.

She felt the church should be led by a plurality of leaders, not by a pastor, and especially not by "paid ministerial staff"...that was just bad stewardship of the church's money. Well, my husband was a church staff member...a paid staff member. (I can feel the embers of hell upon me.) We had a PASTOR and we also had a leadership team!...but still, it was completely an abomination to God in her eyes.

Then came the issue of our church BUILDING. I was quickly informed that if we were really a bible believing new testament church, then we would meet in the people's homes. Great! I told her about our home care groups...not good enough. We still had a sinful building keeping us in bondage.

Then there was the issue of worship...now remember, my husband is the Worship Pastor of our church. We were told that true worship is "melodic" and does not have a beat--that is of demonic origin...called a "back beat". So my musically minded husband took me through the hymnal and showed me some of the "demonic" songs with that horrid back beat timing ...Amazing Grace?

Then one summer I wrote a missions training curriculum to use for the kids at church and we did a summer program called "Mission Friends"...but I was quickly called to the carpet about how our church was in error in letting me, as a woman, TEACH. After all ...women are to be silent in the churches (wrote Paul, who traveled with PRISCILLA and Aquilla who both taught (the man) Apollos...).

I will spare the gruesome details of what happened when I became to ill to continue homeschooling and we put our kids in school.

The friendship was just getting to be mentally and spiritually exhausting. Good grief, all I wanted to do was be a part of a local body of believers and have a place to call my church home! And 14 of those 19 years of friendship, this was the DAILY DIET of "fellowship" between us.

Who would ever of thought that our beliefs about CHURCH would cause such controvery?

So I don't know what concept you have of church...but for our family, church is so much more than a BUILDING...it is the heart of relating to Christ through the individual expressions of his body (ie, his church).
Church is for training (regardless of building or location)...church is the people...who train one one another, disciple one another, and serve one another so that we can go into all the world and make more disciples and reach a lost and dying world for Christ. Our Church Family is often closer to us than blood relatives.

Our relationship with our church family is more real than the air we breathe. It is not just a puch card we check off to feel better and say that we showed up for Christmas and Easter...it is about relationship. It is holding the hand of someone on their death bed. It is helping a mom with a critically ill child. It is celebrating with a newly wed couple. Or standing along side of a single mother...and assuring her she is not alone and she has FAMILY because we are a church--in every sense of the word. It is truly poetry in motion.

I feel really sad for the people who will never experience this kind of relationship with Christ--simply because it may inconvenience their family time. Brad and I spend a great amount of time explaining to our kids that though we have the same blood and DNA coursing through our veins, there is a family that is even more stronger than that...the family of God and we make sure we have integrated them into the greater family than merely just blood relatives. The church is made up of fallable people. I should know...I am one! But even with bumps and warts and all...the people that make up the body of Christ are worth the effort!

Even my friend of 19 years who drew me out of her circle...

Dawn