Undone

To Melt Like Wax in the Presence of the Lord


If I had been fully prepared this morning, I would have had my camera in tow! But like a kid on Christmas morning I was just plumb goofy as I gathered my bearings to make my way to church for our Anual World Missions Conference. This has to be, hands down, my favorite time of year on our church calander (ahem...I mean next to Christmas and Easter , of course!).

The Missions Conference, to me, is more like a true Family Reunion...you know, when you get to see your distant relatives that you really admire...but only once a year. The kind of gathering that leaves you unable to sleep the night before and you stare at the ceiling thinking of all the things you want to remember to ask your family during their visit in town...and you stay up so late you forget to bring your camera the next morning when you finally get to church!

It was one of those moments that really should have been captured on film. It was a moment during the worship service that truly left me UNDONE. Craig Logan, our friend and missionary to the Philippines, took his son Justin and with a genuine heart of worship danced with Justin before the Lord. (But since I lost the moment, I took this photo of the Logans from their website. )

Craig and Justin danced to LOOK WHAT THE LORD HAS DONE...and it came to the part HE SAVED ME JUST IN TIME...and I remember the story Craig told a few years back when Justin was in such dire physical health that the doctors gave him no hope of survival. Craig related to how the Lord told him this was Justin's song and that when he sang it to remember that : HE HEALED MY BODY, HE TOUCH MY MIND, and HE SAVED ME JUSTIN TIME! Though many in the congregation may not have known the significance of this song to Craig and Justin, I knew. We read the monthly news letters from Craig and Michelle and we pray for this family. Their picture is even on our refridgerator! What I saw in their passionate dance before the Lord was simply prayer in motion! It left me UNDONE. I felt the tears fill my eyes. I looked over at my kids. For years, the missionary news letters from the many missionaries our church helps sponsor have been the real life adventure stories around our dinner table! Each Missions Conference is a chance for my kids to meet their real life adventure heroes and make the concept of "missions work" something up close and personal...something they can put a name and a face to year after year.

This year a few of the missionaries that are normal guests at our conference were not able to come...and my kids were the first to let me know that the absence of these missionaries were NOTICED...at least to their tender hearts who were looking to meet up with ALL of their real life heroes this year!

Then came Sandy Carter. Now, somewhere in the story of babies being left to die in their hospital beds after birth due to the high financial costs of caring for the number of abandoned babies at the hospital, and Sandy's desire to open an infant orphanage to rescue these children...somewhere in this scenario lies the mystery of my HEARTSONG. My husband has asked me for the last two years when I planned on going to Nicaragua and work at the dump in Managua with Sandy with our church's summer mission team. Last year I just did not feel it was possible. It was summer, my kids would need me home...hundreds of reasons why not to go. He asked me again earlier this year if I was going this summer. Somehow my husband is just as convinced as I am that at some point in my life, I have a divine appointment to go to Nicaragua for a missions trip.

As I listened this morning, that same conviction still remained. I thought of the many reasons why this would not be the best time to go...the battle with Lyme, finances, and oh yeah... I missed the deadline! So maybe this is not the year. Maybe I am to prepare for next summer. All the while these thoughts and concerns were floating through my head I could remember the words of my pastor...

"...one day, when I stand before the Lord...I don't want to have excuses!!"

I did a mental inventory all the stories of faith and unlikely heroes I could think of....

Roger West shared a good one tonight! Moses...."Here am I Lord, send AARON!!"

Paul with his thorn in the side.

Jonah, the runaway missionary with a bad attitude!

Peter...need I say more? (But hey, he is the ONLY one of the disciples who walked on water!)

Thomas...doubts...(you and I both, my friend!)

Priscilla...I am sure Apolos was grateful no one had yet taught her that women were to be silent in the churhes...LOL! (She is one of my real heroes! And being that She, Aquilla and Paul were running buddies, had she truly misunderstood the issue of women in minsitry don'y you think Paul would have mentioned it to her? Hhhmmm...just something to ponder!)

All these people of faith were unlikely heroes...but called none the less.

So if Moses studdered, and Paul had his thorn, surely Lyme is no problem for God if one is willing to GO.

This year? Next year? I don't know...but I do know that my feet will touch the soil of Nicaragua before I die. That is a settled issue in my heart. God planted a seed in my heart about that country. The social worker inside me is still praying fervantly that the doors of that country will fling open wide so that international adoption will be legal in that country!

Father God, may your presence that surrounds these precious servants of yours who serve in their foreign feilds forever melt the hearts of those around them...may the hearts of the people melt like wax in the presence of the Lord as they hear the age old call and commission:

Go ye therefore into all the world...

Here am I Lord...send me.

Love, Dawn